Communication in resolving disputes is so important. Learning to stop and listen, and trying to understand things from someone else’s perspective is crucial in trying to grasp why a person is acting a certain way, or feels a certain way. It can help diffuse a big part of the emotion, allowing for better open communication, understanding, and resolved disputes, faster.
When you sit with a lawyer to discuss your legal issue/dispute, you and the lawyer are generally only viewing the problem from your perspective. You relive the past (quite often with negative emotion attached), you retell your version of events, and you actively reinforce your memory of the event, from your perspective.
We all have a sense of fairness. We look for fairness in most areas of our lives, even at work or on the sports field! Why does that change when it comes to disputes? Fairness is a subjective value. It is fair or not based on our own personal values and beliefs, based on our core values that are unique to us.
When we want a solution to a dispute and we ask a judge in a court to decide, the judge will make a decision based on the law applicable to your case and there will be a solution to the legal problem. That solution is objective because it is the decision of a third party appointed for their judicial mind. The solution is said to be just and that justice has been had. If that were the case, then why are so many litigants unhappy with the outcome? There has to be a smarter way!
It takes empathy and emotional intelligence to achieve a resolution to a dispute. In mediation everyone moves forward together by taking the time and courage and willpower to see the problem and the consequences from the perspective of the other person. Mediation offers the opportunity not just to achieve fairness and a solution but a lasting outcome that resolves everyone’s interests.
Have a dispute that needs resolution? Why not contact SHAW Mediation, where our team will be able to advise you further and set up a free initial consult with SHAW CEO Alison Shaw.